Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Life as a chess game...

I promise this will not be as philosophical as it sounds... this stemmed from a conversation Nicole and I had about the Knight on the chess board... after playing an intense game of chess.

So this King guy, he's here to be served and look glorious. We'll call him George Bush. He likes to pick fights with all of the people who can knock him over. Or nuke him. And when I say him, I mean us. And the Queen, well she has to do everything for that slob. We'll call her Condoleezza Rice. She's a bitch. But she can do what she wants. The Bishops are sneaky... and also they move diagonally. We'll call them Jeb Bush and and those tricky "signing statements" that Bush likes so much. Just in case something goes wrong, Bush has his brother in Florida to fuck things up. And these signing statements allow him to pass laws that he doesn't have to abide by. How sideways. Oh and the Knights. Well, they're special aren't they? We'll call them "No Child Left Behind" and Laura Bush. They seem to aim to do one thing... but get confused half way through and do something completely different... and what would you expect from someone who can only move in the shape of an "L", two steps forward, one to the side. The Rooks... well, they're just plain destructive. And since he is quite destructive, we'll just call Dick Cheney both of the Rooks. He's just a big idiot with a lot of power that likes to push down the skinny dorks on the playground. And sometimes shoot old men... but that's a different story. Finally, we have the Pawns. Or as I like to call them, the military. Well... the King makes them do his dirty work and usually, they die.


Anonymous said...

Sounds like you're taking over for Kent, SINCE HE DOESN'T UPDATE ANYMORE.


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